“A mother is not a person to lean on but a person to make leaning unnecessary.” -Dorothy Canfield Fisher West Milford First they are newborns and the next thing you know they are teenagers. What a mother may not be prepared for is the day her child says he or she is joining the military. They will now be truly standing on their own two feet, just as she has been preparing them to do, but those two precious feet may now be in harm’s way. Speaking with two West Milford women who are members of the Blue Star Mothers of America, Inc. gave some insight into the emotions a military family experiences. Blue Star Mothers history The Blue Star Mothers began in Flint, Michigan in 1942 after 1,000 mothers of servicemen filled out a coupon run in a local newspaper. Chapters spread across the country and the mothers became active during World War II working in hospitals and train stations and served as part of homeland security during the war years. Blue Star Service Flags were displayed in their windows announcing to the world that this was a proud military home. When the war ended the organization dwindled but after the attack on Sept. 11, 2001 the Blue Star flags once again began to appear in the windows of families who had children serving their country. The organization values the service of all men and women of the Armed Forces and the memory of those gone before. They lend support to veterans and importantly to each other. They are patriots with a strong allegiance to their country and their children. Her only child in the military U.S. Army Specialist James McMahon’s interest in the military began during a visit to West Point. The then-fourth grader, whose dad had passed away when he was eight years old, felt at home in the military atmosphere. His burgeoning interest in the armed forces grew through his school years and it alarmed his mother, Tammy Jordan, and his stepfather, John. “I have lost people in my life and he is my only child,” Jordan said. After the 9/11 attacks McMahon further indicated his desire to serve his president and his country. His parents tried to dissuade him by making him look at the realities of war. “This was his decision but we made him wait until he was 18. It was very hard to let him go,” Jordan said. In June 2008 he graduated from West Milford High School. Two weeks later he was in boot camp. McMahon is now a military police officer stationed in Fairbanks, Alaska. He has an eight-month long deployment in Iraq behind him during which time communications with his family were sometimes spotty and the nature of conversations were stilted for security reasons. “I prayed the Rosary every day,” said Jordan. “When he came home I didn’t stop because I was so grateful.” Jordan has come to terms with her son’s choice and wants him to follow his heart. Her heart is soothed by her involvement with the Blue Star Mothers. Caring for all service members by sending care packages, inspirational letters, working with community groups to get them involved in their efforts has strengthened her. Military is in his genes Donna Nix’s son, U.S. Army Specialist Brian Darby, gave up a full college scholarship to join the service when he was 18 and wanted to get married. He was working three jobs and spinning his wheels so he enlisted. Nix was against it but all the signs of a military interest had been there for years. Attending school in Florida, Darby had been involved in the ROTC programs in middle school. They wore uniforms, participated in drills and competitions, it was basically junior military training. “His dad was in the Coast Guard and he talked about the military since he could walk,” said Nix. “Instead I wanted him to be a hometown hero.” Darby, now 21, has been in the Army for two years. He is currently stationed in Georgia accompanied by his wife, Sara, and their one-year-old son, Brian Anthony. He has just re-enlisted and plans on making this his career. “As long as he stays on this coast, or this continent, I’m okay with it,” Nix said. But being apart is very difficult and the next family visit is unknown. “The military are thanked and supported for their service,” Darby said. “It’s harder for the wives and families. They didn’t choose the military but they have to deal with it.” Kindred spirits Blue Star Mothers volunteer their time in a variety of endeavors such as providing medical supplies, food and clothing. They take part in rehabilitation efforts, attend patriotic events and work at the USO and hospitals. They are kindred spirits of the Gold Star Mothers - those who have lost a child. “Blue Star Mothers have tomorrow with their children but Gold Star Mothers only have yesterday,” Nix said. Nix’s wish for her son, and all those serving the country, is a long, happy, healthy life. If the Blue Star Mothers have their way that wish will come to fruition.
For more information on Blue Star Mothers:
Web site:
http://www.BlueStarMothers.org
Local information: bsmnj3@gmail.com
Blue Star Mothers of North Jersey
Chapter #3
P.O. Box 343
Wanaque, NJ 07465
A Military Mom’s Prayer
Give me the greatness of heart to see,
The difference between duty and his love for me.
Give me understanding so that I may know,
When duty calls him, he must go.
Give me a task to do each day,
To fill the time when he’s away.
When he’s in a foreign land,
Keep him safe in your loving hand.
And Lord, when duty is in the field,
Please protect him and be his shield.
And Lord, when deployment is so long,
Please stay with me and keep me strong.
Author Unknown