West Milford "Many adults are in denial about their parents’ mortality and avoid asking questions about their estates and wills. Oftentimes they do not want to appear greedy about their inheritance or controlling of their parents’ personal matters,” said Richard Gopin, local resident and president of Concordia Financial Group, Inc. We live in an age where planning ahead makes all the difference. Many families do not discuss finances until a crisis occurs and then it can be too late. It is far easier to talk with parents when they are healthy than when they are incapacitated or hospitalized. Adult children can play an important role in making sure their parents’ estate is in order, as well as ensuring they are financially capable to take care of themselves for the remainder of their lives. Statistics show people are living longer and their retirement savings must be stretched to last a lifetime. It is likely that at least one parent will need some sort of assisted care in their elder years, making long-term care insurance a very wise purchase. The American Health Care Association estimates that the cost of a nursing home can exceed $50,000 a year, while assisted-living facilities average $24,000 annually. By having open discussions with aging parents now, you can help to improve their financial health, reduce potential problems and ease burdens in the future. Gopin, a Certified Financial Planner for over 15 years, put together the following tips should help to make that conversation easier and more productive. 1. Pick the right time to talk. You want to make sure to have the conversation when you won’t be interrupted and when everyone is relaxed. Having this discussion during the holidays may not be the best time. You also might want to cover things in more than one conversation. 2. Maintain a sensitive stance. Don’t be judgmental of your parents. Remember, this is a difficult subject for them to discuss. You may not agree with their decisions, but keep in mind they are competent adults. A good way to set the right tone is by saying, “It’s important for me to understand your finances in case I need to help you in the future.” 3. Involve an expert if needed. In some cases, it might be easier for your parents to talk about these matters with an outsider than with a family member. 4. Make a list of assets and liabilities. This is an important place to begin once the conversation starts. You’ll want to note the date and cost of assets, as this information will be needed for tax purposes if any assets are sold. 5. Establish arrangements for financial management. Your parents will want to consider establishing a durable power of attorney. 6. Know where important documents are kept. Make a list, including birth and marriage certificates, wills and trust agreements, Social Security records, burial instructions, insurance policies, bank and investment statements, mortgage and real estate deeds and auto ownership records. Be sure to get bank information, including safe deposit box number and key location. Also make a list of important contacts with phone numbers such as financial advisors, doctors and attorneys. 7. Review estate planning and investments. If they haven’t done so already, encourage your parents to develop a plan to maximize their legacy for their heirs. Also be sure to discuss their investment strategy so you have an understanding of their financial well-being. 8. Understand your parents’ health care wishes. You’ll need to know where your parents stand on health care issues should they ever become incapacitated. If that should occur, long-term care planning is essential.